Ralf Weiser's Blog – Shake Up Your Snow Globe! ©

Stop doing, shake your globe, ponder, dream, start reaching your full potential – live on purpose and do it with a smile!

Worst kept secret to get people’s attention

This comes down to one simple concept:  Do not tell – ask open ended questions.  Why is it a worst kept secret?  That is because so many people know about it and yet choose not to employ it.  It is a mental challenge that you must be willing to accept.  Attention is scarce and not easy to come by and you might be tempted to use every opportunity to tell people about yourself and your ideas and concepts.  You may not believe me, but you might as well not say anything – yet.  There is a time for everything and when you are just meeting people for the first time and even folks whom you may have known for a while, just hold back with your stuff.

So how do you connect to people in a more meaningful manner?  Simply, you establish rapport by asking engaging open ended questions.  Hold on and fasten your chin straps because you may get to know so much more even about friends you may have known forever.  When you let your counterparts connect at a deeper level you can finally intersect yourself.  Do it in a way such that the topic and your answer are still a fit.

This equates to a win-win situation for everyone involved.  The people you connected with will get to know you and they got a decent amount of attention.  That should make them feel pretty good.  The very same folks will also provide you with attention that you had better use well by providing valuable information and help.  How much better will you feel if something that you said helps someone else in social life and even career?  It may merely provide them with another point of view, which may help them make a better decision in the future.

It is this seemingly little stuff that can make a huge impact on you and others.  Do yourself a favor and give this a try.  Tip: Next time that you are at a family or company gathering instead of asking “What do you do?” ask “Can you please tell me a little bit about yourself?” perhaps with a follow up one like “What are you most passionate about?”.  Of course only try this if you are really genuinely interested.  Have some fun with this.


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