If you always do what you always did, you are always going to get what you always got
You are in agony because you are not happy where you are in life. It may be comfortable, yet something is missing. Perhaps your social and work life is complicated and you are facing the dilemma of really rocking the boat if you start making changes. You are stuck between making a change and this could set off an avalanche of good, bad, or indifferent things and remaining the same and being miserable. During the day your thoughts may not cross the path of these issues, but at night you may not be able to sleep well because you cannot turn off your brain.
The reason why you are not sleeping well is most probably related to you not wanting to hurt people. The daily routine would be disturbed when you start being candid about what you really want to do and where you want to go. Your thoughts are mainly affected by what other people may think about you. In the end you rather put up with the pain in your brain rather than making going through the pain of changing.
Bottom line is that if you do not make a change, you will always get the same results and nothing will change – ever. Do not expect a different outcome when you do not change your approach and do not be disappointed. Change is easier to come by than you think though. This starts the moment that you decide to take action.
There are two basic approaches to handling a situation like this. For one you can apply the abrupt method that I would compare to taking a Band-Aid off with one swift motion. Sure, it will hurt a bit when you make drastic changes, but you are typically done relatively soon after the change. The other method, which I prefer is to slowly test the water and make gradual well planned changes. These will allow to plan, act, review, and re-adjust your path along the way. Planning the change is the most important part of this strategy. Break what you believe to be the big issue into more bite size chunks and see how you can implement them step by step.
The good thing about changing your status quo is not necessarily the actual impact the change has or achieving the final goal of it. Your even bigger reward is how you feel about having made the change in the first place. The path to your final goal is more important than your final goal by itself. Just realize that you have to start somewhere, otherwise you face a lifetime worth of regret. What is your first issue that you will tackle? Make a promise to yourself that you will choose fighting the status quo.