If only these other people would change – They know what I know…
Life can be pretty frustrating. At work for instance you often speak with a lot of folks who see and know what you know and yet they seem incapable of change. Frustration is off the scale when it’s the boss who cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel. He waits long enough for it to become a full size freight train that will hit your company, or at least your department. Good news is that there is a way how to change this, but it is not what, or better who you think it ought to change.
What happens next is that you possess above average critical thinking and emotional intelligence that enables you to generate a few pointers that should be able to get the boss and the department out of the troublesome zone. You float the idea and the boss may even have an open ear for it. Then – nothing. Most often nothing happens. If you are lucky enough the average manager may get back with you after a while as to why nothing happened, but unfortunately frequently there is nothing but radio silence.
You cling to hope. Hope goes last and that is why you cannot believe that such a vast amount of blissful ignorance can possibly exist in one spot. You try and try again to patch things around you and any team or colleague with the goal and your solutions in mind. You know that the solutions would likely work.
On one hand you are ready to leave, and on the other you just cannot let go – yet. If only the boss would listen. Your co-workers I am fond of, but they do not say anything even though they are as fed up and complain louder than you when the boss is not around. In other words you are stuck in mud all the way to the axles.
Now finally the good news: You can change this 360 degree loop into never-never-land by starting with you pondering what changes you can make. Here is your getting started list of open ended questions for your pondering and wandering sessions to come:
- Is this work really me? As if you had not thought about this over and over again, what is more important is the solid answer that needs a clear and uncluttered mind. Choose solitude with no outside chatter and interference. Journal your thoughts. Read and re-read this journals and listen to your inner voice.
- What provides me with energy rather than taking it away from me? In order to decide what else you should be doing you will need to know what your talents and gifts are. Those are the ones that will provide you with energy even in stressful working environments.
- How many tries have passed by? Is this the second or thirty-third time that you have tried imparting your knowledge onto your leader-manager(s) and nothing has changed? Obviously, the latter may give you a nudge to make a more dramatic change.
- How realistic is change in others who are in charge? Unfortunately, there are some general trends that may not increase the odds in your favor. The smaller the organization, the lesser the chance of change. Conversely, the bigger the organization, the more political and slower the change, but when change happens it may be so fast or dramatic that you also may not like it either. Either way, scan for the possibility of change. If it is not to be had perhaps this is telling you to move on.
- What happens when nothing happens? Is no change really that bad? If 1 though 4 have not rendered any really significant findings you may either stuck in what is knows as a midlife crisis, or this is simply not the time to make a change. It is just not time to jump ship now and hence do not put your brain into NASCAR speed loop mode. Take a deep breath and start feeling better about yourself. Put your mind at ease.
- What is my plan “B”? If 1 through 4 do tell you that you have to start pursuing a new chapter, please include a plan “B” in your master plan. You never know what can happen and that makes planning for the best and worst case scenario a must (besides that, it reduces the anxiety that your significant other will experience).
- Where is my support crew in this? 6 hinted to it, but here it is in a separate point. Please make sure that your support crew is informed about your next steps and goals. Your support crew comprises family, friends, acquaintances, and everybody who means something to you.
- How can I line up a coach who can help me out of this? I hold the opinion that everyone should have a life coach. Seek out people that you look up to and ask them if they would be willing to become your coach. A coach is someone who can provide genuine and constructive feedback and provide a subject matter specialist insight of how other professionals would solve your issues. MeetUp and your LinkedIn groups may just render such people if you know of such folks right now.
The above list can be of help in providing you with the process of narrowing down your choices and also providing you with a backup plan. In the worst, or best case scenario depending on where you stand on the point of view, you may be enjoying a totally new career path. Who knows sometimes all you needed to know that where you are in the process is not so bad after all? Then you can finally enjoy a little less homemade stress as your brain is not perpetually locked into thinking that there is something out there that you are missing.
Yes, I am serious. Even in the most unlikely employment issue you are still the one who holds the one key choice in your hand. Do you choose to be part of a no win situation, or do you choose to change your reactive approach to a more pro-active one?