Ralf Weiser's Blog – Shake Up Your Snow Globe! ©

Stop doing, shake your globe, ponder, dream, start reaching your full potential – live on purpose and do it with a smile!

Archive for the category “business development”

Stop to Think – How to save your career and life


Stop to Think – How to save your career and life 

Photo credit: Ralf Weiser

It was just yesterday when my son and I helped clear storm damaged trees and bushes away at our local Scout camp. I noticed the sign on the chipper: Stop to think! There are so many dangerous areas and devices on this thing and when you are busy to feed this beast you will get hurt if you do not slow yourself down to think about a safer way putting material into the hungry and eager jaws of the chipper.

It is an ingenuous sign that I wished would be affixed to the rearview mirror of your car, or even as a sign put on your desk. We get triggered so easily into actions we later regret dearly. Road rage can only happen when you let your lizard brain engage into fight, flee, or freeze mode. Same at work were we may easily get engaged into a battle of wits with a co-worker just because we don’t give ourselves enough time to think about a more thoughtful response. We duke it out with our spouses when certain trigger words or actions happen.

We are not our thoughts. A thought is a thought and we control our thoughts. We have to make an active choice how we want to think about any situation though. Oftentimes there is no right or wrong, but there is a better or best way to handle any situation. That can only work if you stop and give yourself plenty of time to think about your choices. That will save your life and limbs working with a tree chipper as it does in all other aspects of your life.

Stop to think!

Ralf

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One of the most effective ways to make any conversation effective


One of the most effective ways to make any conversation effective 

How many friends could you make with your mouth versus your ear? Oh my, this question hit me square in the forehead quite a while back. Here you have all the technology to reach out to so many people in real time and yet nothing matters until someone starts to listen. The key to making a difference is learning to keeping your mouth closed and to just listen. You can inject your knowledge and experience etc into the dialog depending on the questions that you will be asked in the process of listening. This is the most effective way of making any conversation a win-win situation.

It remains one of the toughest things to do for me. How about you? You have so much to share. You have bundled up so much experience. You have been on an excited life’s journey that should be shared. There is a time to share all of this, but you need to scan for the best time to do so. Best practice is to park your desire to make statements and assertions – that is if you are interested in learning something new about the other conversation partner. It is takes a little exercise, but the rewards can be remarkable. Then you need to literally force your brain to think about how to switch from questions that would give you a yes/ no response to open ended ones. At first, you will not fell easy about this, but just recall that these questions had better start out with a W or an H (where, who, why, what, when, how).

Stand back and then stand by what ensues. The greater percentage of people will enrich your life by blessing you with their experience, talents and most of all they will give you two elements of human interaction that are the most scarce these days: They are now giving you their attention and a little bit of trust that if you do this well can last a life time. That is how you make any conversation highly effective.

Blessed beyond measure,

Ralf

How does one sense someone’s power and gravitas?


How does one sense someone’s power and gravitas? 

Photo credit: Pablo by Buffer

Just very recently I got a call from a good friend of mine. We talked about the things we would like to achieve next – our life goals. I was not so sure that could pull it off when she shared with me that she thought that I could do anything I would set my mind to: “The very first time I met you, I could sense that you have an unbelievable power and force.” For starters, I was very thankful for her kicking me in the side for doubting myself. After all, believing in yourself and realizing your full potential is what I believe in and it is something that I am trying to let others ponder too.

More profound though, I was taken aback about the mere fact that someone could sense power and / or force. Huh? How in the world does this work? I thought about the many people I am blessed to meet. Very often I can sense that there is something special about them. I catch myself thinking that I should really make an effort to paying attention to what they have got to say. There may be a certain calmness and competency that “oozes” out of them. They may share a sense of substance and competence without as much as saying a word.

So here is the puzzler part for you: How do you tell that someone has these powerful attributes? Is there something physical that you can pick up on? Is it something they say? Is it how they say it? What makes you want to hang out with them? What are the non-verbal clues that you can sense? More importantly, how can you tap into this unseen power as well?

Ralf

5 ways of being better about being in the moment


5 ways of being better about being in the moment 

Social media are great. I just love using all sorts of platforms as they have really enriched my life and I can get and stay in touch with so many old and new friends. And then again, nothing beats a great warm hug – person to person. One thing that social media has not been able to do is to genuinely connect us humans the same way as sharing a moment together in person. So how do you balance the two?

The answer is surprisingly simple. Use social media and all its bounty to the fullest. At the same time scan for opportunities where you can connect with folks at a deeper level. Seek face-to-face meeting time wherever and whenever you can. Do not be afraid of personal contact like a hug either. Here are some examples where personal connection can foster a much brighter future:

  1. Moments of collaborating genius: No matter where you meet, there are tremendous opportunities getting to know new people, and / or meeting folks at a completely different level.
  2. Major disagreement: Using texts and e-mails when you are upset are mind-numbingly ineffective. Get up and meet in person.
  3. Friends in need: This is the positive version to number 3. When friends are in dire need of help, meet in person. Flush out the real back ground of the issues. Your active listening may lead to finding a solution, and you earn respect and trust.
  4. Meeting your future significant other: You may be able finding your mate online, but you had better eventually meet in person sooner rather than later.
  5. Funerals: Filled with emotions they can be really tough. As tough as it is, try making a genuine new connection or rekindle an oldvvvv one.
  6. What are your greatest moments of meeting with folks in person? Please share in the comment section.

Don’t get me wrong, I just love connect over the Internet and use whatever new tools come our way enhancing my relationships and helping other folks wherever I can. At the end of the day, I still make sure that I go out into our interesting world seeking personal contact. A truly genuine moment between two or more people can still take our breath away, and it will be with us forever. I’ll give you a hug before you can get out your smart phone…

Ralf

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