Ralf Weiser's Blog – Shake Up Your Snow Globe! ©

Stop doing, shake your globe, ponder, dream, start reaching your full potential – live on purpose and do it with a smile!

Archive for the tag “blogging”

3 elements of powerful decision making


3 elements of powerful decision making 

We make so many decisions every day that we can barely recall them all. Then there are these decisions that keep us up at night. That is because we have someone or something that we really want to pursue; it feels right and we so want to make progress and yet we do not have a warm and fuzzy feeling.

Makes for a terrible night of uneasy sleep, huh? When we are really infatuated with an idea, chances are we may be making a really risky decision that we will regret later on. Never making a decision is just as bad. The older we get we make decisions more and more with our intellect. It is however heavily influenced by historical events because we want to limit our pain that comes from having made a poor decision.

So what can we do?

The secret of powerful decision making lies in the power of three: Intellect, Heart, and Instinct. What I mean by that is creating your version of a decision balance sheet. It is divided in these three main categories.

Typically, your first response to any given decision you have to make is taking you down the right path. Make a note of what that is. This is the first reaction to a decision you are facing. Now enter what your heart – meaning compassion, empathy, love, passion, etc – tries telling you. Now reflect on what your intellect is telling you. In other words you are breaking up your decision tree to a more manageable decision tripod.

Resist the urge to the extent possible arguing your way to a result you wanted to get to from the get go. Instead, start with your question that keeps you up first. Then follow your answers to all three main criteria. Finally round it all up with pondering if and how your decision will still look like in 2 to 5 years from now. Is it long term sustainable? How much fun will this by in the long run?

Sure, I did almost forget including the element of fun and excitement. Keep that in balance with the risk you are willing to take and you will start sleeping much better. Happy pondering.

Ralf

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Listening to understand – it’s what our country and society needs the most right now


Listening to understand – it’s what our country and society needs the most right now 

Can you hear me now? No, this is not an old commercial for a cell phone company. This is about how we listen to other people. Unfortunately, on average we are very bad listeners. We listen to talk instead of listening to understand.

That is a very important differentiation. We are so filled with so much information and so many opinions that it is just waiting to bubble right out of us. Instead of seeking to really understand the other person, we just cannot wait for the other person to finish such that we can jump in with our stuff. It’s got to be said. Or does it?

Please help stop this craziness. Make a habit to take a deep breath and wait before saying anything when another person is speaking especially in a group of people. Ask yourself if any input of yours will make the others better off. Resist the urge and say nothing if you cannot add value to the conversation. Seek to understand what is being said. More importantly focus on what isn’t being said. Finally, use challenging questions to get information from the others to get to a decent understanding about the issues at hand. Ask questions that cannot be answered with a Yes or No.

Never waste a good chance to really understand another person. All it takes is silence on your part. Whom and when to ask is another line item to think about.

Ralf

Ready for a laugh? Humor is when you can laugh anyway


Ready for a laugh? Humor is when you can laugh anyway Smaller FB

Do not take yourself too seriously and laugh often and hard. That is my basic recommendation and I have a natural talent for providing the situations that let me and others laugh – hard. Yes, I know this is a lot harder to put into daily practice because so many events seem to be outside the things we can affect and they seem to happen to us rather than you being able to do anything about it. Well, it comes down to using your power of choice and actively choose looking at events at a different light even if you have to laugh / smile later. This has key health benefits besides being a great stress buster.

Take for instance the one time when I hurried through the Memphis airport and I went to the rest room. As I was sitting in the stall I was looking down to my right and my left and to my surprise I was looking at high heel pumps. In my rush I had mistakenly gone into the ladies room. When the voices disappeared in the room I bolted out of the room and even managed getting to my flight on time. That was embarrassing but nowadays this story makes me laugh any time that I think about it.

Not too long ago I brought my kids along for a car service appointment. They wanted to stay in the car and I allowed it. I watched them go up on the car lift while the tech started working on the vehicle. Unfortunately, I had managed to come in around lunch time and the tech promptly took off enjoying his lunch break. Both kids started panicking in the back of the car and I could do nothing about it until the tech came back from lunch. That was not fun for anyone.

Many years ago I ended up forgetting that the local river had flooded and I turned my old car into the floating pontoon because I went over a berm way too fast and could not brake in time. It did not float for long but I did manage to get the car back out of the river. One thing that amazes me to this day is how fast the water went into the car, but how much of it stayed inside. I had to drill holes into the rocker panels in order to finally drain it all. Unfortunately, in the wintry months following the incident I had to scrape the windows on the outside and inside. Now this story makes me smile, which back then I was not laughing much at all.

Laughter is therapeutic in more ways than one. It takes for you to just starting to pay attention for the things that you can provide for yourself or the ones that happen around you. Funny self-depreciating humor provides you also with great ice breakers for social events and especially when you are in sales or a public speaker.

Have fun having fun,

Ralf

How to be one of the cool people we admire: They do not care what other people think about them


How to be one of the cool people we admire: They do not care what other people think about them

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Photo credit: Ralf Weiser, Captain Sig Hansen in Bethlehem PA 2014

Admit it, people who know what they are doing and don’t care what other people think of them are just cool. They typically know what they stand for and have a list of goals that they are busy pursuing – and they are successful doing just that. Being good looking helps, but that is not necessarily a pre-requisite.

Take for instance the crew of the “Northwestern” from the TV reality show “Deadliest Catch”. Sig Hansen, his brother, and Jake (another crew member) were on tour in 2014 and I got the chance to see them in Bethlehem PA. Their antics were instant classics. Sig for instance threw out the water bottles put in front of them by the stage crew. He replaced it with a beer he had brought on stage with him from his room. He did not care that they were not supposed to do that. During the whole evening they acted out exactly like they were on the TV show. Him and the others did not care the least that they had hundreds of guests watching them.

So what makes them so different from us? Well, nothing at all. We all have the same potential as them. The only one difference is that they have not granted power to other people. Yeah, that’s right. That is the small but most important difference. They strongly believe that no one has power over them unless they let go of it to others.

Getting to know this principle is the easy part. How can they be so sure of themselves? That is the tough part. In order to gain self-confidence you have to spend quite a bit of time pondering your purpose. What legacy do you want to be known for? Where are you headed? Whom do you want in your life who can pursue your goals together with you?

That is why we admire other people: they are true to themselves. Good news is that we can all start in a moment’s notice. You’ve got to start though.

Ralf

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